Cummin’ in the Wind

(To the tune of a folksy, Bob Dylan-esque ballad)

(Verse 1)

I’m out here on the prairie, got my boots in the dirt,

Cock’s out in the open, yeah, I’m ready to squirt.

The breeze is blowin’ wild, it’s a hell of a spin,

I’m strokin’ to the rhythm, cummin’ in the wind.

(Chorus)

Cummin’ in the wind, let it fly, let it soar,

Sprayin’ cross the meadows, I ain’t keepin’ no score.

No shame in my game, it’s a natural sin,

I’m howlin’ at the moon, cummin’ in the wind.

(Verse 2)

The cowgirls in the distance, they’re gigglin’ and wet,

They see my one-man show, it’s a sight they won’t forget.

I’m pumpin’ like a piston, got no need for a friend,

The prairie’s my lover, cummin’ in the wind.

(Chorus)

Cummin’ in the wind, let it fly, let it soar,

Splatterin’ the sagebrush, leavin’ stains on the floor.

No preacher’s gonna stop me, no laws gonna bind,

I’m fuckin’ up the sunset, cummin’ in the wind.

(Bridge)

The tumbleweeds are rollin’, they’re catchin’ my load,

My balls are singin’ freedom down this lonesome dirt road.

I’m jerkin’ to the starlight, it’s a hell of a grind,

The wind’s my fuckin’ witness, got no secrets to hide.

(Verse 3)

Some folks call it nasty, say I’m breakin’ the rules,

But I’m just paintin’ nature with my glistening jewels.

The coyotes are howlin’, they’re my backup band,

I’m shootin’ for the heavens, cummin’ in the land.

(Final Chorus)

Cummin’ in the wind, let it fly, let it soar,

Drenchin’ all the badlands, I’m the king of this lore.

No fence can hold my spirit, no cage can hold my sin,

I’m screamin’ to the cosmos, cummin’ in the wind.

(Outro)

So grab your hat and saddle, join me if you dare,

We’ll fuck the open ranges, spray our love in the air.

The wind’s our only master, it’s where legends begin,

Forever we’ll be cummin’, cummin’ in the wind.